I had a beautiful walk with a dear friend today. A kindred spirit kind of friend. Someone who thinks about the same stuff that I do. It feels so good to have people you can talk to about love, loss, the universe, the ego and it’s mad love for illusion, disconnection and duality. You know, the stuff that doesn’t get discussed quite nearly enough at soccer games and playdates. 😉 But seriously, we need to get deep sometimes. We need to discuss our struggles with existing on this sometimes tortuous plane of existence. It’s not always easy being here. There’s bills and sickness and politics and pollution and addiction and extinction and global warming and human trafficking and nuclear weapons and war and terrorism and gun violence and bugs and Donald Trump. There is so much to fear that is outside of our minds, let alone the chaos that can ensue inside our own heads.

That’s why we need friends. And nature. And walks with friends in nature. We can talk about the chaos, and also the understanding that we sometimes manage to gather and collect over time. These kinds of conversations comfort me. They reinforce in me the belief that there is more to this life beneath the surface. My ego has been a real bastard lately and when I reach out and connect to a like minded friend, my ego seems to fade a bit and my true self/spirit seems to come forward and join the party.

I know the ego has it’s place, but it seems to cause so much pain. And separation. And judgement, which leads to more disconnection and negative energy. I am currently reading Gabrielle Bernstein’s book, The Judgement Detox, and I am really seeing how much judgement affects my life and my relationships. If I am going to be honest, I probably judge everyone I know to some extent. Positively or negatively, I’m most likely thinking you are doing things better or worse than me, which does me absolutely no good at all. Judging you doesn’t really make me feel better, although I might think it does at first. Judging you keeps you at a distance, and makes me inferior or superior, keeping me at a distance. With judgement, the ego keeps us separate, which keeps the ego alive and well. Love, light and unity are ego killers, so if fear, anxiety and lots of crazy thoughts plague your days, it’s safe to say your ego is healthy AF.

So, what do we do about this you may be asking. I’m trying to figure this out myself. Every. Freaking. Day. We need to stay in touch with our spirits. Find people, places and things that light our souls up and raise our vibration. My friend was laughing about a text I had sent her recently about my anguish over this “meat bag” that my soul inhabits. How much time I’ve wasted worrying about this thing that houses my soul is a complete an utter crime. And I’m still committing it, which is even more baffling. It’s nuts when you can recognize rationally what you are doing but you can’t seem to catch up emotionally. It sucks, actually. To fight my inner crazy, I workout, spend time outside, plant flowers, walk my dogs, read spiritual literature, meditate, journal and spend time with those I love. Life is such a struggle sometimes and the daily mundane crap can make me want to poke my eyes out. But I don’t. Because I’m a mom. A wife. A daughter. A friend. A human being who is here to learn and grow and evolve into her best self. There is so much beauty and love around when I decide to look for it, or better yet, when I reach out and try to connect with it. The magic is there. It’s everywhere really. We just have to break through the illusions and there are so many. So, so many. But I believe we will get to the other side. Some days I see the light and it’s so damn bright. It’s amazing what a walk in nature can do for the soul. Go for a walk today if you can. Breath in the fresh air and clear your mind. We’re all going to be okay. I just know it.

Photo taken at the end of our walk. (Georgia is beautiful)